End Times Phone

I have a Motorola Droid. It can do everything. Well, almost everything. When I told my mom that it has the capabilities to track the exact location of other people with a cell phone, she said that I had an end times phone. I told her that every cell phone has GPS capabilities that can be disabled at the owner's discretion. She's not convinced.

While my phone cannot predict the 2nd coming of Christ (only God knows that. Matthew 24:36), it can suggest the perfect beer to complement your meal, become a tool to hang your artwork perfectly level on your wall, teach you how to perform CPR on your child, track your steps, find the nearest Starbucks (or 5 bucks as JD likes to call it) wherever you are in the world, teach you spanish, warn you of speed traps in your area, and about a bazillion other useful and not-so-useful things. Most importantly, it can entertain Beatrice for hours with animal sounds, bubbles, coloring, and sing-alongs all while the phone is safely in lock mode. Oh, and it can place calls. Basically, it is the most awesome phone in the world. Yes, even more awesome than the iPhone. ::Ducks for cover::

I had a Blackberry for years until JD convinced me that Droids were the best thing out there. I was reluctant at first when during the first week, I couldn't figure out how to place/answer a call on the darn thing. But I learned and found out that he was right. Yes honey, I said that and it's in black and white for the whole world to see. Don't gloat. The phone is freaking awesome and I typically spend more time on its browser than I do on my 2nd most awesome piece of technology ever: my MacBook. So what does he want now that he has turned me from my loyalty to my beloved Blackberry? To get rid of his Droid and go back to a simpler phone, like a Blackberry. I love that a Blackberry has become a simpler phone once you experience a Droid's awesomeness. 

This is the most annoying thing about my husband: he convinces me that we need to get the best phone/camera/computer out there and after a few months, decides that he wants a Blackberry/Polaroid/PC. The annoying thing is not that he changes his mind. No, it's the fact that we always lose money when he decides he wants to go back to a simpler form of technology. "I just don't use all of the stuff like you do," he says, as if this is a perfectly good reason to get rid of whatever he doesn't use. Being the submissive wife that I am, I never make him keep whatever it is he wants to downgrade. I just ask that he sells it for the cost of the replacement item. And since he always decides that he needs less technology, we always lose money because PCs cost less than MacBooks and Blackberries cost less than Droids. Sigh.


We are trying to convince my mom to trade her new Blackberry for his Droid. I downloaded the Bible app on it in effort to prove that it has no relation to the mark of the beast or other end times signs and wonders. She has not made up her mind yet but I think she will come around. After all, it's just a phone. Or is it? ::Insert maniacal laugh here::