I Have A Problem

What am I going to do when the pralines are gone? I bought a pound and a half of sugary maple pecan pralines when we were in Savannah last week and I have been eating them with a vengeance.

I love sweets. I mean I really love them. I have an insatiable appetite for sugar in my veins after every meal. I'm down to 5 pralines and I don't know what to do once they are gone. I've already considered ordering them online or even making my own....

I'm not particularly proud of being from the South. Don't get me wrong, I am not ashamed of my roots. I just don't consider myself a true Southerner. I don't like country music, I don't like fried foods, and I have a thing for enunciation. Folks here slur big words together to make a shorter, almost unrecognizable one. Shelbyville is pronounced by the locals Shub-vull. I say Shell-bee-veal. The english major in me cannot mispronounce things on purpose. It's my cardinal sin. 

But put a slice of chess pie or dump cake in front of me and I'm as proud to be a Southerner as a parent of an honor roll student. Southern ladies can bake. And nothing is as Southern as a classic praline. Which begs to be asked, is it pray-leen or praw-leen? I'm going with pray-leen. 

So with only 5 pralines left, I am carefully calculating how to finish them off. Do I eat them in 1 sitting and be done with them? Do I start halving them to make them last longer? Should I be generous and give them anyway? That will never happen, not with pralines. I think I'm leaning more towards denial. I'm going to keep eating them without thinking about the fact that they will be gone soon. I'm sure I can find something else sweet and decadent to eat.