Someone Feels Neglected

I have a problem and it's starting to affect my marriage. I am addicted to mindless time-wasting nonsense. What is mindless time-wasting nonsense, you say? For me, it is internet message boards, internet Scrabble, Angry Birds on my cellphone, crocheting, reading, and watching TV. I am addicted to all of these things and must be doing at least one activity during the time that Beatrice goes to bed at night until I go to bed. This is causing issues.

It all started when JD left last year for the federal academy. It was winter and I was stuck inside all day with a 2 month old. Alone. For 6 months. I relished the "me time" every night after I put the baby to bed. It was the only time during the day that I got to veg out and do whatever I wanted for as long as I wanted. For the most part, I wasted time playing online or watching reality TV. Hello Real Housewives of Everywhere.  Then I started crocheting so at least the mindless time-wasting nonsense I was doing was somewhat productive. Once JD returned, it was too late. I was hooked on doing whatever I wanted at night. I couldn't stop.

For months now, JD has been begging me to put down my computer/book/yarn/phone and spend time with him. This never happens. And not because I'm a jerk. JD doesn't want to have meaningful conversations or cuddle. He wants me to put down my things so that I have free hands to tickle his arm/rub his shins/massage his back. Those are the last things that I want to do with my spare time. So I ignore his requests and continue playing on my computer/reading my book/crocheting with my yarn/playing Angry Birds on my phone. He is getting upset.

Last night was bad, probably my lowest point. JD begged me to cuddle with him on the couch while we watched a movie (AKA lay across me with his entire body, crushing my bladder. Super romantic and cuddly). So I conceded. HOWEVER, I had my computer on his legs (which were crushing my bladder) and my phone in hand. I was playing a round of internet Scrabble and 4 games of Scrabble on my phone. Yes, 5 games at once. I know. I have a problem. This infuriated JD. He wanted me to rub his leg with my free hand. But that was the problem. I had no free hands. So I ignored him. I played my games until my phone shut down for 12 hours. Seriously, I killed my phone. It would not power on at all. By the end of the movie JD wasn't talking to me. He said that I care more about games than I do tickling his shins. He was kidding of course, but I got the point. I need to lay off the mindless time-wasting nonsense. For the record, I thought the bladder crushing cuddling was quality time. My bad.


So tonight I am blogging while he is watching TV. He keeps poking me with his toes and I'm guessing that means he wants to crush my bladder cuddle. Maybe tomorrow night, Dear.