I Am Grumbly

See that? That's the last time my bed will be made during the day. Along with JD's promotion at work came a really terrible shift change: midnights. That means no more sleeping with my honey, no more accidentally elbowing him in the head in my sleep, no more bringing Beatrice into bed to wake up Daddy in the mornings, and no more making up the bed. Why bother when it will be 2 pm when he gets out of it everyday? 

I'm really trying to be positive about this change, but I am totally bummed about it. JD worked midnights when we dated and it didn't affect me too much other than we never talked until the afternoon. He worked while I slept and slept while I worked. We saw each other on weekends and he stayed up really late. When we got married, he switched shifts to one more conducive to family life. I loved it. I made him promise me that he would never work midnights again. He promised. I knew that he would have to put in some time at midnights when he got this position but I hoped that God would provide an opening at a different shift. I'm still hoping and praying. It's really going to be difficult not having him here at night, but more than that, how the heck am I gonna keep a baby quiet for half the day while he is sleeping?

Having a spouse that works all night is like living with someone that has a different life than you. I guess that is what makes me the saddest: he is going to have this separate life from us while we sleep. And we will have ours while he sleeps. No more family togetherness at normal times. He'll be eating breakfast and drinking coffee while Beatrice takes her afternoon nap. I can't vacuum in the morning while Beatrice watches cartoons, I can't dry my hair in our bathroom, I can't fold laundry on our bed. See God, we really, really need JD to work during the day. Pretty please. 

I know that I am being whiney and grumbly, but I hate this schedule. I hate having my husband in the house but not being able to hang out with him because he's sleeping. I hate sleeping alone. I hate complaining about things that are gonna happen regardless of me complaining about them or not. Sigh. There's really no point to this post other than I wanted to complain a little more. And to show you my bed made for the last time ever. I might as well stop folding laundry too. And cooking. And writing because this post is starting to annoy me. I know that I should be grateful to have a husband who works hard no matter what the shift and loves me despite my grumbly nature. I am, really. But I'm not happy about this change. Not one bit. Therefore I am grumbly.