Today is Penelope's first birthday. Every time I sang to her, nursed her, or had a flashback of her first day of life one year ago, I cried. In fact, I have spent the last 12 hours in tears. Off and on, all day, I have teared up thinking about how fast the last year has gone by.
I knew it was going to go by quickly. I had already experienced the fast forward of time with Beatrice's infancy. I tried to savor every late night feeding with Penelope, every snuggle, every cry, every exhausting moment. It didn't slow time down though. My second baby's first year flew by just as fast.
Reflecting on her fleeting babyhood has made me realize how precious the time we have with our children is. Not just because baby cuddles are the best, but the time we have to teach and influence who our children grow up to be is short. I want to make every minute count. And if I can't slow time down, I want to concentrate on each moment I have in the future to teach and train these girls to love God, to live lives that honor Him, and to love others. On her 18th birthday I want to look back and say, "man, I did a good job." And then I'll cry because it went by way too fast.
Today wasn't all tears. We did celebrate our baby with lots of Happy Birthday To Yous, a picnic at the beach with friends, Skyping with family, cake, and presents.
It's a good thing Penelope has a big sister. Otherwise she never would have gotten into all of her gifts.
Sissy had a great birthday. She is so loved and cherished and I think we did a good job showing her just how much over the last few days.
I continued my birthday ritual of recounting their birth stories before bed on the night of their birthdays. Penelope smiled and nursed while I told her about the first moment I kissed her squishy newborn face. I rocked her all the way to sleep while looking at all of the itty bitty photos of her from the past year on my phone. And I cried.
It went by too fast, sweet girl. Way too fast.