Friday, August 17, 2012

The Beginning of the End

I think Penelope is trying to wean. She is only interested in nursing in the mornings. The rest of the time she is too busy or gets easily distracted and doesn't focus on drinking her milkies. This has caused me many mixed emotions. Part of me is really excited to have my body to myself again, to be able to wear regular bras, and not have to dress with easy access to the goods in mind. The other part is really sad this part of motherhood is almost over. Mega sad face. 

I nursed Beatrice for 15 months. I planned to go longer, but the time was right to wean. It made me sad for a second because I loved having that connection with my firstborn, but I was a few months pregnant with Penelope at the time and knew it wouldn't be long before I would be nursing another baby.

Penelope came soon enough and we began our nursing journey. Feeding her has been such an easier and more enjoyable experience than my first go around. It is probably because I know what I'm doing and have way more faith in my body's ability to nourish my girl, but also, she's just a better nurser. Where Beatrice took her time and fidgeted, Penelope gets the job done. We never had an awkward learning stage, she never bit me, she doesn't try to undress me in public to get at the goods. Nursing her has been a real joy. I enjoyed nursing Beatrice too, but it has been a completely different experience this time around. 

I'm not sure how much longer Penelope and I will continue to breast feed. I have a feeling it won't be very much longer. I am proud of the work my body has done to feed my girls, proud of the wear and tear its endured, and proud of the commitment I made and kept to nurse for the first full year of their lives. I'm a little sad it's almost over, but mostly glad we made it to a year without any hiccups along the way. I sure am going to miss these snuggles though. Mega, mega sad face.


  1. I was just thinking that one of the things I'm most looking forward to with baby #2 is nursing him without the worry about going back to work. It's such a special time with little ones. Way to make it the whole first year with both kiddos!

  2. Ah what an emotional time. I was a basket-case when Jack stopped nursing, so I know the emotions you are feeling. Good job making it for so long! If she is ready, she is ready! Its definitely tough though

  3. Aw, I know the feeling :( I am so unsure of how our journey is going to end and I worry about it daily but just try not to and pray it will all work out. It's an amazing accomplishment to make it a full year or longer! There is just nothing else like it. sigh...