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Will Power - 1, Cravings - 0

I feel like I need to preface this whole post with saying that I am totally okay with gaining weight while pregnant. It's necessary, it's normal, and it's no big deal. But I overdid it with Beatrice. I gained 48 lbs and I felt miserable. In the last months, my knees hurt, I struggled to breathe, and I got a lecture from my OB at every visit. I was out of control with overindulging and it made me feel like a loser. This pregnancy, I want to do things differently. I want to listen to my body and eat healthy choices. If I still gain 48 lbs doing good things for my body, I can deal with it. But I at least want to try to do things differently and not give in to every craving. So says the woman that just made a hotdog at 3 in the afternoon because she was craving one...


I finally stepped on the scale after last week's foodfest. I gained 2 lbs. In a week. And before you say, "the baby needed it," keep in mind that the baby weighs a little under 6 ounces this week. My weight gain did not go to the baby. It went to my new chin. For a moment, I saw myself spiraling into the out of control eating I did with my first pregnancy. I decided that 2 lbs wasn't too far gone to change my habits so I talked to my doctor about healthy snacks and she gave me some great ideas.

Instead of sitting down during Beatrice's nap time with a box of Girl Scout cookies, I eat a piece of cheese and a hard boiled egg. When I was in elementary school, I begged my mom to boil me an egg for my lunchbox everyday. My lunchbox smelled terrible and my friends didn't want to sit next to me when I ate it, but man those eggs were good. The key is eating protein throughout the day so my blood sugar doesn't plummet. And I don't eat at every sign of hunger. I will drink a big glass of water and if I'm hungry still, then I grab some almonds or an apple. I eat the usual 3 big meals and have 2 small, healthy snacks in between. I feel great. But the best part? I think it's working. I dropped those extra 2 lbs and have maintained my 5 lb gain (total) for this pregnancy.

I have a friend who's pregnant now and is 10 weeks ahead of me. She has gained 5 or 6 lbs in all. Pregnant women who gain a normal, healthy amount of weight make me a little green with envy. Not only do I want to be cute, I want to feel good too. I learned the hard way that gaining 48 lbs in a matter of months is really hard on your body. It is uncomfortable and unhealthy, according to my doctor who cracked the whip on my expanding hide every month. My newfound commitment to self control is not about dieting, but being in control of the state of my health. I don't want to be a bystander to this pregnancy and blame the weight gain on cravings. I have will power and I am going to use it. And if I still gain a ridiculous amount of weight, I'll be okay. I will know for sure that that's how my body handles pregnancy: by gaining a 3rd grader. But I will never know until I try to do things differently and take my doctor's advice. We will know in a few months. Hopefully, the score at the top of this post will be the same.

Gratuitous Violence

I like gratuitous violence. Not in real life. Just in the movies. I love a good action flick chocked full of shoot outs and crime and bad guys wreaking havoc on innocent victims, only to be brought to justice with even more excessive violence. I like it all. If my body is not clenched and tense for the duration of the movie, it's just not entertaining to me. Just so we're on the same page, violence does not mean horror or torture. I hate anything purposefully scary. I like realistic scary, like when disgruntled customer service reps turn into rogue bank robbers that kill to get ahead. THAT could happen in real life, and I want to watch it all go down on the big screen so I can be prepared. Just in case. 

This works out pretty well for my husband. Like most men, he likes action movies. We rarely argue about what to see at the theatre and our Netflix queue has the perfect balance of violence and documentaries, our second favorite genre. Occasionally, there is a romantic comedy thrown in the mix. JD is a sucker for Reese Witherspoon and girls with bouncy hair and wedding dress dilemmas. He's my sensitive man.

I minored in Film Studies in college. It was the best minor to have because I spent 4 years watching movies in class. I watched movies for homework. I watched movies for tests. Of course there was more to it than just watching movies. We had to analyze plot structure and character depth. There were genre studies that taught us the different indicators to each film type. We studied style, editing, and theory and while all of this was very interesting and super fun, it ruined me from just escaping into another world for an hour and 45 minutes like my collegiate counterparts studying less awesome minors. I couldn't watch a film for entertainment because I was dissecting it analytically the entire time. This has caused me to lose a lot of movie-going friends. No one likes going to the movies with a wannabe know-it-all who tries to explain the economic implications the course of the plot has taken. It's like changing a light bulb with an electrician. You don't want to hear about wattage and energy usage, you just want light. Same thing with watching a movie with me. I annoy myself, really. Plus all of my friends like romantic comedies and I would rather gargle dirty dish water than endure one of those. Sorry friends. 


Gratuitous violence has cured me of intellectually watching a movie. I can get lost in those action packed films and not once think about character development or the director's purpose for using camera angles a certain way. Who cares about that when the bad guys are karate chopping their way through your front door ready to pillage your things and break your face? Not me. So thank you, action films, for being the cure to my movie watching dilemma. You never let me down and you always inspire me to kick more caboose and fight more crime. You know, when those bad guys are coming. I'm doing the world a service, really. One action movie at a time.

Trash

Beatrice is such an independent girl nowadays. She likes to put her own shoes on, take her diaper off, and pick out her hair bows for the day. She can go to the toy box and get out her blocks, build a tower, and clean it up all by herself. If I need to get dinner going, I ask her to help me and she "cooks" with a wooden spoon and tupperware. She can finally follow directions and do things on her own and it's pretty great. 

Her newest thing is to throw away trash. It started with wadded up receipts she'd find in my purse. "Trash, mama," she would say as she toddled to the pantry trash can to throw it away. Such a helper. We have since moved on to carpet fuzzies, stickers that have lost their sticky, and food that falls on the ground. After the 5 second rule has passed, of course. This is all very helpful, as you can imagine. However, she has begun to throw away some non-trash items as well. I have found my wallet, lipgloss, our electric bill, sippy cups, and my keys in the trash. These are very clearly not trash and I'm a bit nervous that with my pregnancy brain, I will forget to look through the trash before it gets thrown out and lose some vital possession. Like money. Or my phone. Or my makeup. That stuff is vital not just for me, but so the rest of  humanity's eyes won't bleed upon catching a glimpse of me without it. Shudder.  

Oh look, a sticker.

I wonder if it's still sticky. 

Nope. Trash, mama!

16 Weeks

The other day, JD mentioned something about how in 9 more months we would have another little baby. I said, "9 months?! Try 5!" He couldn't believe it. And neither can I. Time is flying. I feel a little bad about this. With my first pregnancy, it seemed like time was dragging. Each week seemed like a month and every little change occurring in my uterus was the biggest deal ever. I haven't thought a ton about this pregnancy. I mean, I think about the baby, but the pregnancy seems to be going along just fine without me worrying about it. That tends to happen when you have a toddler.

I'm enormous. Not so much in my belly, but everywhere else is growing rapidy. I had my weigh in at the doctor's office last week and much to my surprise, my 5 lb gain was really only 4 lbs. So I celebrated by eating everything. I made cherry cream cheese pie and mashed potatoes with cream cheese, sour cream and butter (divine but oh so bad for you), ate lots of sour gummy rings, giant turkey sandwiches with avocados crammed in, and pizza. Lots and lots of pizza. I haven't weighed since Wednesday but my face is fat now and once your face gets fat, there's no stopping your rear end and thighs from following suit. I am praying for will power and self control. I think you all should pray for me as well...

Stats


Weight gain: Not on your life am I stepping on a scale until my next appointment in 4 more weeks. Ignorance is bliss.
Stretchies: None.
Movement: YES! YES! YES! I now know for sure that those bubbles I've been feeling are not gas but my sweet little ballerina. (Or soccer player).
Cravings: Carbs.
Sleep: I can't complain. I wake up rested.
Best moment this week: Hearing the sweet lub-dub on the doppler.
Gender: It's totally a boy. I keep having reoccurring boy baby dreams. It's a boy.
Labor signs: None.
Belly button: In but starting to look a little strained and weird.
What I miss: A skinny face.
What I'm looking forward to: Dinner. And dessert.
Weekly wisdom: Time flies. Take a moment to enjoy the little life growing inside because before you know it, they will be on the outside.
Milestones: Besides the fat face and movement? It's time to bring the maternity clothes out of the attic.

From now on, you will see many of the same outfits on me. I don't buy a lot of maternity clothes because A) they can be expensive to only wear for a few months and B) I tend to go into denial when I get too big for my regular clothes. I repeatedly wear what still fits because it makes me feel better about myself.

The Park, A Story in Photos

Pregnancy Brain

There are many gross/amazing/weird things that can happen to your body when pregnant. A dark line marks your belly, your nose gets stuffy (and wide), and you pee all of the time. You also lose your brain. Seriously. JD never believed me on this when I was pregnant with Beatrice. I would forget whatever critical thing he told me to pick up at the grocery store before I even pulled out of the driveway. I would forget plans that we planned for weeks. I would forget to make dinner. I was constantly trying to convince him that forgetfulness in pregnancy is a real thing. He never bought it.

But it is a real thing. It's called pregnancy brain and it plagues many women (and husbands). For the most part, my experience with pregnancy brain has been annoying and frustrating. I hate it when other people tell me things that I said with no recollection of ever having had a conversation in the first place. Forgetting the key ingredient for dinner gets old. But so far, my forgetfulness has never endangered anyone. Until today.

Last night I left the key in the front door. All night. While we slept. Amongst burglars and bad guys and lions and tigers and bears. JD could not find his house key this morning and after looking in the usual places, he woke me up to see where I put it. "Check the kitchen counter." He did. "What about the table in the foyer?" Yep, not there. "Check the front door." Bingo. Apparently, after coming home from dinner last night, I forgot to pull the key out of the lock on the door. Oops. Of course we're all fine. Thank you bad guys for not pillaging us last night.  But this was a big what-the-heck-is-happening-to-my-brain kind of moment for me.

I really don't want to be dangerous to my family. I take precautions for all for all of the possible dangers in life. But are you really responsible for things that you forget you ever did - or didn't do? The good news is that pregnancy brain only lasts for a few months. The bad news however, is that it is replaced with mommy brain. My poor husband better start locking the doors himself at night.